Ooh child things are gonna get easier
Milkc covered the song "ooh child" by Five Stairsteps and if you haven't had the chance to listen to it please do your mama heart a favour.
More often than I would like to admit I doubt my capabilities of being a mom, I look at my beautiful boy laughing and playing and looking so carefree and innocent praying that I don't screw it up somehow, because its easier to make a mistake than always trying your best not to. We as parents put a helluva lot of pressure on ourselves I know I do.... that I sometimes forget to take a break and take him in, all of him, from his tiny feet that have grown so much to the amazement in his beautiful blue eyes when he discovered something new, I experienced some of his first milestones through a camera lens trying to capture it rather than just freaking watching him and taking a video later.
When his teacher told me that he bit someone in his school I immediately thought it was my fault, what if I made it okay to bite when we were playing "tickle monster" on the couch or when I bit his cute little toes after bath time, what if those fun laughing moments we had somehow generalised biting a kid on the arm?
I have to admit we had a bite free week and we're pretty sure he's over this phase .
Being pregnant with a rather demanding toddler running around the house is exhausting to say the least, and I admit I lose my cool sometimes I'm sure every mom does. Sometimes I'll say "no" a little louder than normal, or ignore a question asked more than 5 times in a row even after I've answered, I even cover my ears and close the door behind me hoping the constant "mommy" would quiet down, I have a smile on my face when I'm having a conversation about the record tantrum my toddler throws knowing that I felt like giving up when it happened and in those moments, I immediately feel a rush of guilt, I wipe away my tears, I hide my fears and the love takes over. At times like these I find myself singing this song not just for him but for myself because I know "it will get easier, it will get brighter and someday we'll get it together and get it all done"
So when you feel a little "sucky" or "meh" or guilty about saying no a little too loud, ignoring the question asked over and over even after you answered more than once, or closing the door to the bathroom to shed some well deserved tears, wash your face mama scoop them up, give them kisses and just sing the song and remember......
“Some day
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day